Simply Christmas

A new baby brings with her many many firsts, not the least of which is the first Christmas. Baby or not, Christmas is certainly a time that can breed lots of stress, and it's even easier with a child in the picture to fall into the trap of pressure, spending, and overbooked schedules.

Nevertheless, I was determined that this year would be as simple as ever - taking one day at a time, and enjoying friends, family, and the beginnings of new traditions through the Season. Many a day was spent knitting, baking, watching Christmas movies, and thoroughly enjoying the 7 o'clock bedtime that comes along with a three-month-old. And come Christmas day, all of our family gathered in our home to share a meal together, the first time we've cooked for a crowd since Baby L was born. The day was calm, gifts were simple, and everyone enjoyed the company of one another. In all, one might categorize it as a typical, un-noteworthy Christmas. But it was anything but that, because it was the first. And I pray that Baby L will experience many similar holidays in the future that she will remember as times of love and family, food, and warmth.

Though Baby L won't likely remember this Christmas, she was a wonderful companion as we baked, trimmed the tree, and made gifts to give to her grandparents. How does a baby make gifts, you ask? Well, here is a simple project that I share with you in photos. It took some patience, but was a lot of fun to do together.

Baby Handprint Ornament

adapted from By Little Hands

First, gather supplies:

Air-dry clay, Rolling pin, Acrylic Paints, Brushes, A drinking glass, and 1 Baby

Other important ingredients:

Patience

Humor

Time

Roll clay into 1/4 inch thick rounds and gently press baby's hand into the top. This may take several attempts, and I recommend that if you are making several ornaments, you leave the supplies out and do one or two at a time as baby's mood permits.

Use a drinking glass to cut the ornaments to circles, and punch out a hole using the handle of your paintbrush.

Let the ornaments dry according to the clay instructions and paint them as desired. Metallic paints seem to make the impression stand out better. I used silver paint and then painted Baby L's name and the year on the back of each ornament using pink.

Hang on the tree or wrap for the grandparents to enjoy!

Be Still and Know...

In all honesty, it's been a hell of a week and a half. Baby L is now 4 weeks old, and absolutely thriving (as long as I calm myself down and remember not to compare her to everyone else's kid). I am now a year older, following my birthday on the 2nd, and am one organ lighter following an emergency appendectomy on October 1. Yesterday was the first day on my own at home following the surgery, and I felt as though I was plunged right back into the emotional turmoil that is part of bringing home your brand new infant all over again. It's been hard - it is not in my nature to be homebound - and I've been anything but emotionally secure. In my heart, I know that I will be back on my "feet" within the next week or two, but my head grows impatient.

Through all of this, it's easy to ask oneself "why me?" or "what next?" but during the last two days, this statement has been playing over and over in my head. "Be still and know that I am God." So my days have been going something like this:

Baby cries. Be Still.

I cry. Be still.

The night is short. Be still.

I'm lonely. Be still.

I am not alone. I will be alright. We will get through.

The Simplest Act

Many people will quite openly disagree with me on this one, but one of the absolutely simplest things we can do as humans is create new life. I understand the arguments against this: It's hard to come up with the money, the childcare, the time, the security.....

But really, these are all extraneous factors, and when you strip them away you are left with one very simple act that a man and woman were biologically meant to carry out, and that a woman was built to bear and give birth to and care for. If you can manage to cut past all of the pressure and expectations that we attach to the act of creating a person, it's all really quite simple, quite pure, quite violent, quite beautiful.

On September 11, 2010, I participated in Nature's simple act by giving birth to Baby L, a very healthy, petite chickadee of a girl, weighing in at 6 pounds, 11 ounces, and a tall 21" long. She looks everything and nothing like her father and me. Each and every time I look at her I see something and someone new, and I am amazed.

Giving birth was a long ordeal for me. It was 60 hours of back labor and pure physical effort, carried out from what I can only describe as another plane of consciousness. As I was working with all of my effort to bring this little girl into the world, I found my mind and body focusing only on that task - feeling every muscle move, focusing every breath so that it would be productive, moaning from within so that my muscles would contract and move my baby toward the world. I could feel every fiber of my body working to literally burst open and bring forth this new person. And as I finally began to bear down and push as my body has always been programmed to do, there was an explosion of life, emotion, relief, and energy. And it was all so simple. Messy and Gross? Yes. Difficult? Yes. Painful? Hell, yes. Wonderful? Oh, yeah....And simple. Connected to God and Nature and to the act that every mother has done before me. I am still humbled by the experience.

Many people have told me about the phenomenon of the pain of giving birth fading into the background of your memory, mostly so that you'll be likely to want to do it again later. And it's true. Three and a half weeks have passed, and while I am not exactly chomping at the bit to have another baby, my birth story is already losing some of its pain and blood-colored rough edges. But with all of my might, I am trying to hold onto that moment - the moment my whole body broke itself open to allow a new perfect little girl to enter the world. I want to hold onto the connection to the universe that I felt in that moment, and I want Baby L to always know that connection. May her life by rooted in all that is Simple.